"Open Book" Jessica Simpson's Memoir Series (Part 1)
Part 1: Jessica's book starts out with a "breakdown" and admits, "I need help."
"Once I was on the phone with the doctor, I started in with a complete play-by-play of all my life's traumas. The (S.A.-I abbreviated the type of abuse for "sensitive" readers or platforms ) abuse I suffered in childhood, the abusive, obsessive relationships I clung to in adulthood. I was crying, the women doing my extensions were crying, and my friends were a mess. Still I reeled off everything in a matter-of-fact manner, connecting dots about why each event contributed to my anxiety, finally ending with, 'So this is why I need help and why I can't do this on my own.'" Quote from Pg. 33.
Jessica then takes us, the readers, on her "play-by-play" of her traumas and triumphs written in her own voice. Inspired by her late-cousin Sarah's journals, who wrote about praying for Jessica before passing, Jessica developed a habit of journaling since the age of fifteen. She constructed her memoir around writings she scribbled through her life.
Jessica Simpson Early Years:
Jessica Simpson showed early signs of developing as a singer after combatting a "stutter" she acquired as the result of a huge car accident. This accident caused her to fly headfirst into the car's windshield. She went about halfway through the windshield, cracking her skull, and then fell back onto the floorboard on the passenger's side showered by glass. (Her mom also suffered injuries, with a bone sticking out of a broken leg, as well as a broken arm and collarbone). They were both rushed to the hospital where Jessica learned of her stuttering problem. Singing became a way for her to combat the stutter as it allowed her to focus on her words. For the next two years of her young life she would use singing instead of talking to communicate. Around the age of four, her stutter became more pronounced and her parents took her to see a therapist. She kept working on her speech until the stutter was resolved...though she stayed shy.
At that point the family became all about the Baptist church. To make extra money while keeping in shape, Jessica's mom started a "Jump for Jesus" aerobics class at the church.
"Lift those knees for Jesus!" Mom made her own workout video, which I sold. pg. 45
Although "Jump for Jesus" sounds funny, it helped Jessica's family move from a two bedroom apartment to a house. Aside from witnessing entrepreneurship, Jessica also witnessed many times her family "opened their home" out of compassion for "strays" and lost people who had no where else to go. One example, is an overweight teen who ran off with a boy (because she was not used to that kind of attention). This teen finds herself stranded, pregnant with no where to go in the judgmental social climate of the South. The family housed the teen until she could give birth to a baby boy and get on her feet.
Besides being impacted by a lack of stability in her early years, Jessica was abused by a family friend in her early childhood. This was a slightly older girl who would touch her inappropriately during sleepovers. These incidents happened on-and-off for six years. It was a “secret” she held in. Later on Jessica learned her abusers motives for touching her had to do with being touched by an older boy inappropriately. Why did she decide to protect her abuser? It had to do with shame. She also did not want to hurt anyone's feelings. Upon reflection, Jessica sees how allowing people to overstep these boundaries led to letting "men step all over her" in her adult relationships. She also learns she has a "freeze response" to trauma while this occurred (this comes up later in the book when she has a relationship fight and finds herself frozen in place).
Jessica worked up the courage to tell her parents one day on the way out of town from where this girl lived. She and Ashlee (Jessica's sister) and her parents stopped to get gas and lottery tickets. Both girls were given scratch-off tickets; Jessica made a deal with God that her reward for "being honest" and opening up to her parents, would be a winning scratch-off ticket.
Jessica mentioned what was happening to her parents seeing that Ashlee had headphones on...
"My mother slapped my father's arm with the back of her hand. 'I told you something was happening,’ she yelled at him. Neither turned to look at me. Dad kept his eye on the road and said nothing, his shoulders sunken. It didn't surprise me that my mom knew. I already understood denial and how much it fueled the actions of families, especially Southern families. People want to paint the picture pretty, especially a minister's family." Pg 53 - Pg 54
The incident wasn't discussed further by the family. Jessica decided to scratch off the lottery ticket and proceeded to win one thousand five hundred dollars.
They "changed the subject." It was seemingly "swept under the rug" so to speak.
Jessica Finds Her Calling in Chapter 3:
Jessica was "moved" by a pastor who announced, " There's someone here that's going to use their voice to change the world. They will use their voice to minister to others." She has spent years trying to describe the feeling, and still has troubles, she describes she felt a "light upon her." She knew it was her calling to use her singing voice as a way to minister to others.
"God was going to use my voice. It was weird, because I never really knew that I had a good singing voice. I just liked to sing." Pg. 58
At this point Jessica begins entering singing competitions. Her first vocal competition was during the summer of her sixth grade year. She traveled to San Marcos, Texas to sing "The Rose" in a big purple dress with huge sleeves. She won...
She kept on entering competitions. At first, her mom was buying clothing from thrift shops, and after a string of wins they started investing in buying cloths from "Dillards." They would leave the tags on to return the clothing after the competition was over.
One of her mom's friends approached her mom with a newspaper clipping announcing, "The All-New Mickey Mouse Club." Ads were placed all over the country looking for searching for talent. Jessica and her sister watched it religiously and sang along with the current "Mouseketeers" Keri Russell and JC Chasez. The open call was open to 50,000 kids all over the country (instead of just Los Angeles where everyone and their mom has "an agent.")
The day of the first audition, Jessica and her mom stood in line for hours. Everyone was given a "Mickey Mouse Tee" that she still has to this day! They waited among thousands in line for the opportunity to audition. When the time came, Jessica was prepared to sing "Amazing Grace" a song she was comfortable singing. Instead, the casting agents threw her a curve-ball.
They randomly selected songs for kids to sing and dance to. Jessica's curve-ball song was "Ice, Ice, Baby" from "Vanilla Ice."
Jessica gets a callback and the opportunity to participate in an "entertainment bootcamp" at Disney World in Orlando, Florida.
"There's one thing, Jessica," one of the agents added. "You need to work on your acting. We're going to send you to Chuck Norris." Pg. 61
Yes, the Chuck Norris.
Chuck watched her act the first day. The next visit he was more interactive and went over his notes with Jessica. He let her know that she displayed too much expression. He asked her, "Do you know who the best actor in the world is?"
She stood perplexed, gauging if she was supposed to answer, "Chuck Norris."
"Denzel Washington" Chuck Norris answers his own question as only Chuck Norris would do...
(This was an "early thousands" joke and not everyone will get it. If you need "closure" then "Google search "Chuck Norris Jokes." You will find Chuck Norris aggrandized in all that he does and "get" this joke).
Chuck Norris claims Denzel Washington is one of the best actors because...drum roll please...
"Denzel can say anything without moving his eyebrows." Pg. 61
He then taped Jessica's eyebrows down tight. Side note: scenes like this make this memoir "cute,” just as you could imagine Jessica journaling sweethearts over her ‘i.’ Chuck would tape down her eyebrows for every class with him. It ruined Denzel Washington movies for her. She claims to just watch Denzel's eyebrows, waiting to see if they move.
TRIVIA: WHO ARE THE FIRST FAMOUS PEOPLE OR CELEBRITIES JESSICA MEETS?
There's gonna be a test after this blog post, this is one of the questions. Just kidding. After "acting classes with Chuck Norris" Jessica and her family travel to Orlando, Florida where she see the current "famous" musketeers...Answer: JC and Keri (mentioned earlier in this post).
NEXT TRIVIA: SHE "KISSES" ONE OF THE TWO FOLLOWING STARS LATER IN THE BOOK. CAN YOU GUESS? (Answer at the very end).
First within her group to catch her attention was a boy who seemed to be already "on" and competing, grabbing everyone's attention doing backflips in the pool... Justin Timerlake...from Memphis.
Also there, all the way from Canada with his mom, Ryan Gosling.
Next was Christina Aguilera from Pittsburgh. Jessica described her as timid and mousy. She was already "known" for singing "The Star Spangled Banner" before a Penguins and Pirates game. She had a local reputation as, "the little girl with a big voice."
Next to Justin Timberlake's mom, who had a whole portfolio of photographs, Jessica's mom looked "green" with a Polaroid and a school photo in hand. People at Disney had to book Jessica with an actual photographer in order to have headshots for this opportunity. Jessica was put in acting and singing lessons in preparation for the final audition. Everyone (Justin, Ryan, Christina, Jessica) bonded during this time.
"Justin and Ryan were huge flirts, and I was the girl they focused on." Pg. 65 (Who kisses her? Read to the very end to find out).
Soon enough, Jessica was in "the top eight" and her family was instructed to find an apartment in Orlando. This caused her parents to anxiously discuss. Besides, she was auctioning in a $5 outfit from the discount store...would they be able to swing it?
THE DAY OF THE FINAL AUDITION:
The final audition was held on a "Star Search" stage at the Disney Hollywood Studios Theater. Christina Aguilera was first to enter the theater and was set to perform right before Jessica. Christina is described as "almost unrecognizable”. Disney did a "Cinderella Make-Over" complete with contact lenses instead of glasses.
Then a new girl walked into the theater...
She is described to posses "big beautiful brown eyes," just like Jessica's. She also had a southern accent. When Jessica heard her say, "oh my goodness" she knew that this girl also a "baptist choir girl." They shared such a similar look, and at the last minute here she was...
Britney Spears.
From another parent Jessica's mom got "the scoop" on Britney. She missed the camp due to having to appear on an "off-broadway" play. Jessica felt like she was less of a "shoo-in."
Christina was the first up to audition on camera in a green room. It seemed to Jessica she was "holding back" all of the competition...and then... she put on a performance that caused even the parents to gasp.
"How is that even possible?" Jessica asked her mom about how such a large voice could be housed in such a little girl.
Directly following Christina's performance threw Jessica off. She managed to get through her song, but her dance performance and acting did not go well. She forgot choreography and while acting forgot words from her script.
Apparently, all it took was a wide-eyed Justin Timberlake to say something after her performance to cause her to sob.
"Ooooh, what did you just do?" Justin said as she walked off stage.
Jessica bursted into tears at that point. Jessica went back to her parents sobbing. They asked her repeatedly, "What happened? What happened?"
Jessica was inconsolable.
Jessica felt that this was the end of her journey as a would-be "Mousteketeer." The nail in the coffin was Britney's perfect dance performance.
As Jessica's family went to the airport to go home, Jessica couldn't help but think she missed the opportunity to end her family's financial struggles and fights over money. Jessica's mom was finally able to get past her disappointment and mentioned to her that she had a strong feeling Jessica was going to have to face everything again.
Jessica's mom was right...
In the book, at this very point in the chapter, she writes:
"She was right, and I would also see Justin and Ryan again. This story is strictly for the Mouseketeer Clubhouse diehards, but Justin and I met up years later, after my divorce. We were both single, and we got to talking about old times, leaning more and more into each other until, we shared a nostalgic kiss. As soon as the kiss was over, he pulled out his phone.
"I gotta call Gosling, " he said.
"What?"
"We made a bet at the camp," he said. "Who was going to kiss your first. I win!"
"Well then tell Ryan you won big, " I said as he dialed.
"Cause the odds were definitely in his favor." Pg. 68
Alight folks, there you have it! The answer to the above trivia question is: Justin Timberlake. Now, if you are wanting to "copy/paste" quotes in this blog post in a book report, please do the right thing and at the very least credit "Open Book" in MLA format.
Here is the proper citation:
Simpson, Jessica, and Kevin Carr O'Leary. Open Book. Dey St., an Imprint of William Morrow, 2021.
It is always "better" to read the whole book:
Click Here To Buy Book and Follow This Series of Posts:
PS:
Jessica’s memoir emphasizes reaching out for help when someone touches you in a way that feels uncomfortable. She tells this to fans and her own children (in the prologue of her memoir) not to be afraid to speak up to adults or authority figures if you feel uncomfortable with the way someone touches you.
Look out for the "next post" and find out if Jessica "makes it" as a Mouseketeer.
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